The fix

As a non-fulltime crossdresser I have gone through some times where I had little opportunity to dress which can leave people like me feeling a bit depressed and empty. The desperate measures that we as crossdressers can go to to get our fix are just hilarious when looked upon in hindsight. One of the most common practices for crossdressers to get their fix is ‘underdressing’ which means that a crossdresser will go out the house in their socially accepted male attire but wearing lingerie underneath their clothing to be able to latch onto that feminine feeling. Underdressing for me does not work at all! If the exterior does not match the perceived image I have of the girl inside me then I will not feel like a woman; I will just feel like a perverted freak. Yes, this means I have actually tried it but trust me, I didn’t even make it out of the door. In lieu of that I decided to try another method once. I’ve decided it would be a good idea to resort to wearing my least tight women’s jeans out to the supermarket and a girly t-shirt hidden under my jacket. This meant I could not unzip my jacket at any time out of fear of anyone noticing and my pants were just too friggin’ tight and curvy. In hindsight I realize what a fool I must’ve made of myself. I must’ve looked plain ridiculous. And it didn’t even make me feel feminine at all which was the reason I was even doing this to begin with. In fact I just felt really uncomfortable, which funny enough I don’t have when I go out in full female attire because that would feel natural to me. This however did not feel natural at all. So that was definitely a lesson learned for me; either go all the way or just go out as a man. There really isn’t a replacement for going out fully dressed. This is of course based on my own personal experience though. I know there are people for whom these methods might actually work, it just doesn’t cut it for me personally.
Never again!